i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
