Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
