you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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