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Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
