Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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