NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
