i don't like sucking hair
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
