i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
accomplished twins. life is a go
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize