We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
We need a shit load of segways right now
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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