I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
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