Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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