member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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