God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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