Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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