So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
