dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize
