My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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