Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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