i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
as a side note pls kill me
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Randomize