Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
