i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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