I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
