If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Randomize
