come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
the liver wants what the liver wants
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
