I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
