She's JV to your varsity
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize