I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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