If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
there was a trapeze. enough said
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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