Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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