i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
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