my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
