You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
