So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
