And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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