Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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