we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
