Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
