do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
