I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize