is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
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