Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Randomize
