So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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