Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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