I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
is that a dick in a sweater?
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
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