so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
