Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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