I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
