But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
