i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
