So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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