i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
