So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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